Kat Mindenhall, LCSW

If you don’t have the life you want, you’re missing one of these three things

When people hear the word “peace” they often think of a monk meditating, or a deceased person resting, or maybe even something anti-war related. Some may want a peaceful life, but many might think this sounds boring or unattainable. I think it means something a little bit different to everyone. Peace to a mother of five might literally mean peace and quiet. Peace to a single 30-something on the career ladder may mean a break from constant worry about work. So your definition of a peaceful life will vary depending on your situation. I like to think of peace as synonymous with happy (not excited).

No matter your personal definition of what kind of peace or happiness, there are three things that are essential. If you don’t have the life you want I can bet that your life is missing one of them:

Making the best of bad circumstances

This isn’t merely about looking on the bright side, it’s about re-wiring yourself to interact differently with the world. This will change the way you, feel, act, and think. It can change the type of bad stuff that comes your way. We can’t avoid getting old and sick, but we can change our experience of the world.

Loving others and being loved in a healthy way

People with healthy relationships live longer, have fewer mental and physical ailments, and are happier. The good news is that you can contribute 50% of the health to any relationship you are in. A little bit of health goes a long way!

Having expectations that don’t leave you disappointed or worse, hopeless

Ah, the fine art of being a “Realistic Optimist” or a “Positive Pessimist.” Optimism or pessimism alone can be equally damaging because the world isn’t as simple as that. Knowing how and when to use each one is something that those with fulfilling lives have a good handle on.

So, that is what this blog will be about. Simple, easy ways to do a little bit more of each of these three things for yourself and your family.

Think you can stump me? Try it! This isn’t to say that I have every answer for everything, or that this is a comprehensive list of all that you need. (Yes, we need air, food, etc. too!) If there is a topic that you think would be good to address in a post, let me know! Of course, if you comment keep it general for your privacy. If you need to talk about your specific situation that you need help with, you can use the secure contact form to get in touch with me. But, I would love to know what you think, if you would add anything, or if you even agree that these things are 100% essential to a peaceful, happy life!